Crooks Family, A bakers Dozen :)

Ruby’s return to Nanjing

Ruby’s foster brother Wan Qiang, and is adorable and always smiling wife Jing Jing were waiting for us at the airport when we arrived, we knew it must be them as every time the door opened between baggage claim and the arrivals area, I saw a smiling woman bouncing up and down and waiving flowers at us J. Ruby also caught a glimpse of her foster brother through the door and the two exchanged very sweet smiles. Ruby’s Chinese Mom and Dad (her foster parents from age 17 months to age 6 ½) were waiting for us in the hotel lobby. That first nights meeting was a bit awkward and strained for all. We agreed to meet again the next afternoon in their village.

Yesterday started with a visit to the Nanjing Children’s Welfare Institute. Ruby had two special teachers in the 5 months she spent there, and they both came in on their day off to see her. One teacher, a very kind man we remembered from the day we adopted Ruby, cried as he said goodbye to her. Yesterday his eyes filled with happy tears when he saw her, “she is so grown up and beautiful now…” were his first words. We were invited to tour the whole orphanage, Ruby remembered her old room, and a sink where she lost her tooth J. The Nanjing CWI is a wonderful place, fore runners in the love, respect, and care of special needs children. An example I hope more and more CWI’s follow.

And then there was last night….I have so many thoughts and feelings running through my head and heart about last nights visit to the small rural village of Fei Hua, outside Long Tan, about 60 miles outside of Nanjing. When we arrived at the foster families little compound, they were all waiting to greet us. This dinner was a major event in the village!

Ruby has been waiting for this visit for years. She was super nervous and also very excited. She was worried about the interaction between all 4 parents, she was worried that there would be awkwardness like the night before; I think she was worried about feeling split loyalty as well. When we first arrived, they had candies and treats for all of our kids. They gave us a tour of their courtyard home, and there were framed pictures of Ruby (and one of all of us) everywhere! They had more many more pictures of Ruby then of their son J. The kids played in the little courtyard and snacked on treats, and Mike and I requested that the four parents sit and talk for a few minutes (through our translator of course). Mike and I shared how fortunate we all are to have this relationship, to have been sitting together at that table... He shared that we all love Ruby so deeply, and we are all her parents. They asked many questions about her life, looked through all the pictures we brought, watched her playing with her siblings and saw how much Mike and I love her, and they totally changed… They had been so worried about her for the last few years, rumor has it in their village that children who are adopted are not treated and loved as a child, but more as a servant. They said now they can sleep at night again, now they see, and know how loved Ruby is, and what a good life she has, and they are truly happy. This showed. We shared that that now we are all one family, through Miss Ruby J, they cried, we cried, and we instantly became one big family… Awkwardness gone! Ruby came out and saw all four of her parents so close, and we told her we are all one family now, and she cried huge tears of relief and love, we shared a group hug that was filled with so much love for our sweet Ruby, and our new found family.

And then we feasted! More and more and more dishes were served (all cooked by the wonderful smiling Jing Jing) and Xing Ye (Chinese Dad) cracked open the Chinese rice wine. It was like and evening with long lost dear friends and family. Ruby’s first best from the village came to see her and they were so cute together, despite the language barrier. Xing Ye was so excited he said, he has never even spoken to a westerner. He didn’t know what we would be like, he was so happy because he said we are all just the same, and he proceeded to pour us all rice wine and say Cheers to each other for the rest of the night. He was the happy “Cheers “ man, so cute and fun! The night lasted a couple of more hours, kids played, parents and many villagers sat around the dinner and then Mah Jong table and chatted. We all felt so happy there, It was an amazing feeling and I never wanted it to end…. But, we had a long trip back to the city so the end had to come… Leaving was hard, very hard… So many heartfelt tears, so many emotions… Ruby and her Chinese Mom hugged and hugged, then her foster Mom came and hugged me, a really loving long hug. She put my arms around Ruby, hers around both of us, hugged us hard again then told us to go, with her blessing and love…. So many hearts healed, most importantly, Ruby’s....